Naiwen’s Musings

Currently, I’ve noticed that I’m changing a lot for the better, even enjoying random chitchat with perfect strangers. Why? Because they aren’t harmful at all or dangerous to me this current moment. I’ve enjoyed saying hi to perfect and random strangers even when they have approached me first because I’ve distanced myself from my bad thoughts and emotions about them.

There’s some light snow on the ground today looking like cotton candy or clouds from the sky. It’s cold but least it’s sunny with a clear blue sky outside today!

I’m currently appreciating everything in life, even socializing and communication. My treatments have really been helping me overcome my social anxiety, awkwardness and phobia. It isn’t even triggering me anymore.

So far, my life has been enjoyable and pleasant. Although I've lost my phone, I haven't been in a crisis because I know I'd find it somehow. On the plus side, my Macbook has been fixed so I can actually use the Xmas themes on desktop! I can feel Xma's spirit on the way currently in my life! I've never been happier being alive for the moment.

Been meditating on a calming "ocean waves crashing on the shore" soundtrack found on "Soundcloud", my current favorite music app for now. I haven't found out any better ones yet. It has a wide library too and it's completely free and has a "repeat" button. Be browsing my favorite jewelry sites the afternoon! I've had a 3-4 days period and no more today at all! So care-free today!

Am ok emotionally, and had a great day, but am I exhausted physically. Heading to bed doing aroma therapy with my lavender room spray all over my room and with music therapy. Omg, am so so physically exhausted today after my 2 appointments today!

Life's been perfectly blissful for me since I've decided so every moment in my life. I'm just really tired physically because been restless and awake for 4-5 hours last night, but catching on some much necessary sleep in the afternoon with my spa music with water droplet sounds and my lavender essential oils room spray. Last night, I think I've had a stress and anxiety attack and stuff, but I'm ok today emotionally.

So sleepy today, but emotionally ok. I'm taking some rest this afternoon to catch on my sleep. Been up since midnight last night so yeah, been having a sleepless night again. Can't seem to sleep well anymore.

No one has talked to me at all on my road to my usual coffee shop today. I feel blissful and fulfilled to be alive this current moment. Might be binging my favorite show or just browsing my favorite jewelry sites, something to make even happier today. Been perfectly happy with my current life lately.

I've been perfectly divine in life currently, without any intrusive thoughts and feelings on mind at all. Ergo therapy, mindfulness, DBT, CBT and exposure therapy have been very helpful for me to grow socializing and communication skills. I'm not scared at all to use my voice anymore? I've realized how absurd I've been in fearing others. Others are human beings like me too. And even will feel bored not talking to anyone for a few days. No one this week so far has even greeted me at all. It's been really dead quiet in my neighborhood currently.

Therapy has been good today, but I'm physically exhausted. Just resting after posting a bit till dinner and sleeping tonight.

Everything's been so perfectly blissful in my life lately, I've nothing to complain about. No period for Xmas and New Year, no rain but snow and a new phone and case.

I can't believe it's less than 3 weeks away from Xmas!

Life has been looking up for me quite a lot for me lately. I've chosen to enjoy every moment in my life. To find happiness and bliss with everyone and everything in my life. I've realized that I do have the choice to be happy despite it all too in life.