Your Regency
Nov 27, 2022 19:46:00 GMT -5
Post by Radrook Admin on Nov 27, 2022 19:46:00 GMT -5
Your Regency
By
Radrook
By
Radrook
After being in the cramped, hot, musty reception alcove for an hour with nothing to do but stare at the featureless green walls, the downcast, emaciated humanoid was finally granted the interview he had requested. The emerald crystalline office door slid open, and the green-skinned reptilian, who was to interview him, slowly sauntered out with its thick gem-studded tail serpentining sinuously behind its splayed bipedal legs. .
The humanoid watched languidly with trembling hands as the stout planetary Sagittarian Community Admittance Interviewer, took its generous time inspecting itself in the full-length wall mirror before finally taking a seat behind its black rectangular onyx stone desk. Then he sat staring at the humanoid in silence. After inhaling the stale oxygen-poor air deeply, the pale wiry humanoid tiredly spoke hoarsely in order to break the awkwardness.
“I have traveled a vast distance over many weeks to this sector of the galaxy that you call the Saggitarian Spiral Arm, in order to gain respite and start anew, your Regency," he humbly said "That is the reason I am here, as my application clearly explains.”
The reptilian continued staring at him intently with its bulging crimson eyes before finally responding:
“Respite? Respite from what, exactly, might I asssssk?” He glanced at the applicant suspiciously, noting that his attire was not of the local variety, that his black hair was oily unwashed, and unkempt, and that he had dark bulging bags under his bloodshot eyes. He also noticed that the humanoid’s hands were slightly trembling, and that his upper lip twitched erratically now and then, as if strugglingnot to snarl.
“Respite from persecution! Must I divulge all the details, your Regency?” the humanoid responded sadly with a downcast semblance.
“Yessss, of course. You must be forthright if you expect to be accepted here as a full-fledged respectable member of our community! As I am sure you are aware, most immigrants here, are here for the peace and serenity that our planet offers, as opposed to the far more colonized sectors with their burgeoning crime and overpopulation.” The Sagittarian interviewer flicked a red-forked tongue, and leaned back in his plush black leather seat that included an oval aperture to accommodate its tail..
“Yes, true, I am very aware of that.”
“Good, very good. So please divulge exactly what persecution are you fleeing from, and why you feel you were being persecuted.”
“It is a matter of religious issues. your Regency. You see, I became member of this religious sect, and they fanatically expect strict adherence to their code of conduct.” the humanoid responded in a quavering voice as if recounting his ordeal were almost the same as experiencing it.
“Undersssstood. So what exactly did you do? Murder? Theft?, Interspecies copulation? Vandalism?, Blaspheme their sacred gods? Urinated on their sssacred altar? Defecated in their pews?” Each of these were accompanied by a corresponding clenching of the humanoid hands and a facial flinching as if he were being prodded by a hot poker.
“No no your Regency, nothing of that sort. My only offense was not being able to be at their sacred gatherings regularly due to health issues,”
“Health issuessss caused by habits of vice, such as quaffing the forbidden urine of the Havria beast? and going berserk due to intoxication? I assume?”
“No, your regency, I did nothing of the kind! It was for not attending their sacred rituals, as I just explained, your Regency. They branded me as a heretic not only to be shunned, but to be ostracized.”
“Ossstracized in what manner? Reveal!”
“Well, your Regency, since my brethrens' negative opinion concerning me spread in the community, I was eventually forced to seek employment as a miner on one of the planet’s inner moons. But no sooner had I arrived there, than the Krellian supervisor had been informed via subspace communication concerning my inconsistency of attendance at their religious ceremonies. Since the creature who made the call, his reverence Krim, is a close relative of the supervisor who was of the same religion, my application for employment was rejected.”’
“Very unfortunate indeed, yet very undersssstandable! Go on-reveal!”
“Yes Regency. I then transferred to another sector in that same star system to work on an interplanetary transport as an assistant custodian, but immediately, the same subspace message had preceded me with the same results. This happened approximately twenty times, your Regency, before I decided to create some meaningful distance between me and them, and come here, for asylum.”
“Asylum? Asylum here? You?” The reptilian uttered a shrill shriek which the humanoid understood as its effort to convey a laugh. “And what makes you think that we take the refuse of all other sectorssss here?”
“But your Regency, I have done absolutely no wrong. My only flaw is not having attended their sacred ceremonies due to ill health, as I repeatedly explained to them, but to no avail!”
The Sagitarian Community Admittance Interviewer grinned sarcastically revealing two of its ivory-white fangs before responding in a booming reptilian voice:
“Nonsense! You are obviously in perfect health and there are millions of others who are in worse health than you and are always regular attenders at our sacred religious ceremonies here !”
“But I am not of your religion your Regency!” the humanoid almost raised his voice, but caught himself in time.
“But you see, it does matter! You are an execrable example of a faithless individual who blasphemes by striving to discredit the power of the godsssss to heal by proclaiming your self perpetually ill! Or do you flagrantly deny thissss, humanoid?”
“I don’t deny anything, your Regency. I am merely not in good health to regularly attend religious rituals!"
“Ah, but you are in sufficient health to work vigorously for twelve hours in a mining operation and seek employment-are you not?”
“The evening air during which time the rituals are held aggravates my asthma, your Regency.”
“Bahhh! Nonsenssssse!” it shouted and finalized it with an extended hiss for emphasis.
“So you are definitely rejecting my application, Regency?” the humanoid said sadly wiith a downcast gaze at the office's highly-polished white-marbled floor.
“Yes, of course your application is rejected. But in all fairness,” it smiled broadly and winked one crimson, eye maliciously, “your application had been rejected long before you ever set foot on our planet, since the subspace message from your religious brethren had already warned us of your approach, weeks in advance!”
At that the humanoid suddenly raised himself erect and giggled, then he swiftly unholstered his sonic blaster and blew the Planetary Sagittarian Community Admittance Interviewer reptile’s head clean off its reptilian shoulders. Then whistling softly, he went outside, hopped into his rented hovercraft, and left to attend the religious ritual scheduled for that evening. .