Eulogy To Sir Chip

    "Behold! There lies Sir Chip!" the Master of Ceremonies announced.

     "He was knighted just yesterday morning. Briefly renown as Sir Chip for bravely placing a wood chip on his shoulder when jousting and daring the opposing knights, to gently dislodge it from his shoulder with their lance.

     He met his end yesterday evening when Sir Beastly totally ignored the chip and went strait for Sir Chips’s chest instead. Twas totally unfair, since our beloved noble Sir Chip was expecting the thrust against the chip, and not against his totally-exposed chest. But trusting in the agreement, he failed to evade Sir Beastlie's approaching lance thrust and bravely took the full brunt of the impact on that vulnerable area.

    But gallant to the end, Sir Chip never uttered a crie of fear or dismay despite the look of sheer terror on his pale emaciated face as he was dismounted and hurled backwards over his horse's shanks and towards the hard ground.

     Ohhhh! Never has any other unseated knight sailed so gracefully through the ether as noble Sir Chip did earlier today. Never has any other knight managed to produce such a gloriously resounding thud as his rusted armor met stone and his brittle vertebrae met metal.

     Now, of course, he lies humbly in his pine casket with the heraldic chip placed atop as testament to his bravery and as a reminder to other aspiring Sir Chipper's not to follow his example because Sir Chipping can lead to the grave.

  Oh! Fair thee well, Sir Chip! You will never be forgotten for the lesson you have taught us all."

    “Here Here!” Sir Beastly solemnly announced while eyeing Sir Chip's full- bossomed widow as the crowd dispersed and sir Chip was slowly lowered to his rest.


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